Sometimes It’s Not the Dog: The Weight Guardians Are Carrying

Before we talk about behaviour, we need to talk about support.

Last week, during—and after—recording my podcast, I noticed something in myself.

I felt… heavy.

Not in a bad way.But in that quiet, emotional way that comes from sitting with something important.

Because this is what I see every day.

By the time many guardians reach out for help, they are already drained.

They may have:

• spent a lot of money

• received conflicting advice

• had difficult or even harmful experiences

• felt unsupported or unheard

• 
  

And yet… they are still trying.

Still showing up.

Still wanting to help their dog.

As professionals, we often focus on plans.

Behaviour plans. Training strategies. Environmental adjustments.

But something I think matters just as much is this:

Are we actually listening?

Not listening so we can respond.

But listening so we can understand.

Because when a guardian doesn’t feel heard, something happens quietly.

They might nod along.They might agree.

But internally, they could be thinking:

“I don’t understand this.”“This doesn’t feel realistic.”“I don’t know how to do this.”

And then we add more.

More information. More expectations. More steps.

Without meaning to…

We can overwhelm the very person we’re trying to support.

🔒 In the full post, we explore:

• how overwhelm impacts implementation

• why capacity matters in behaviour work

• what true support can look like

• and how small shifts can change outcomes

Here is the link to the paid blog and if you are not yet a paid subscriber, you can access this blog for free when you sign up for a paid membership over on Substack!

https://open.substack.com/pub/muttsandmischief/p/handler-capacity-cognitive-load-and?r=2r5dgd&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

Because this isn’t just about behaviour.

It’s about people, too.